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Cute is evil.

Friday, August 30, 2002

30 AUG 02

The plan was to build on yesterday’s post, but I’ve had a long day. Instead I’ll bitch about ‘N Sync’s Lance Bass. You have to say it that way. It’s the same rule that makes everyone say Rocker Tommy Lee.

The National Aeronautics and Space Administration Johnson Space Center Mission Operations Directorate Technical Data Center’s Customer Service Coordinator is…ME! That’s right, y’all…I work in The Space Program. Don’t worry though, I’m not allowed near anything that costs more than a photocopier. It’s a cool job and I’ve met a lot of interesting people, French astronauts, Moby, the guy who figured out what was wrong with Tom Hanks’ spacecraft…but I haven’t met ‘N Sync’s Lance Bass even though he’s at JSC this week training for a Soyuz flight to the International Space Station.

Let me confess; I find ‘N Sync entertaining. Not their music mind you, but the fact that they’re willing to make fun of themselves and do it pretty well. I’m still laughing about the Armageddon spoof they were in at the MTV Movie Awards a few years ago.

I also like Russians. They never give me the "You never smile" grief I get from Americans and have their own alphabet. Very serious, hardworking people with their own alphabet, the Russians. And they’re sending an American pop star into space. Not the US…the Russians, who have their own alphabet.

The Russians, who have their own alphabet, use "uncultured" as a deadly insult. If a Russian (the Russians have their own alphabet) ever tells you something that sounds like "nikulturniy", break out the dueling pistols. But if they’re going to send ‘N Sync’s Lance Bass into space, I think that the UN should issue a mandate barring Russians, who have their own alphabet, from calling anyone uncultured. At least until they send someone cool into space. David Bowie, maybe. We could rescind the nikulturniy ban for Bowie.

And that makes us larger than life.

posted by latiolais at 0800  

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