Mala Fide dotcom

I'm an iron-tongued devil, I am.

Monday, June 29, 2009

Still Dead

An incomplete list of people who are still dead:

Yasser Arafat

Gordon Bennett

Benazir Bhutto

The Notorious B.I.G.

Sonny Bono

Johnny Cash

Amelia Earhart

Farrah Fawcett

Hussein of Jordan

Michael Jackson

John F. Kennedy

Heath Ledger

          Jim Morrison

          Ed McMahon

          Dick Nixon

          Lon Nol

          Bettie Page

          Elvis Presley

          Haile Selassie

          Tupac Shakur

          Anna Nichole Smith

          Abe Vigoda

          Sid Vicious

          Kurt Waldheim

 Generalissimo Francisco Franco

What? Too soon?

posted by latiolais at 0800  

Monday, June 22, 2009


Four very short stories I originally posted on the Twitter:

After the Vegan invaders were driven from our beloved Solar system, Australia hosted the celebratory BBQ.

The invaders from the evil mirror universe managed to escape notice for several weeks by the clever use of shaving and unslit skirts.

When asked why humanity hadn’t been contacted sooner, the Gnorf ambassador said, “You didn’t have anything we wanted until the iPhone.”

The first thing Rev. Greene did after the US became a theocracy was to burn everyone in Wichita at the stake.

I’m noticing a trend…

140 characters, bucko. Now that’s constrained writing.

posted by latiolais at 0800  

Monday, June 15, 2009

A burning sensation II: Return of the Burn

From Merriam-Webster.


Function: adjective

1 archaic a: of a deed : punishable by hanging b: of a person : deserving to be hung

2 obsolete:bombastic

Bowline, buntline, timber hitch, sheep shank, alpine butterfly, midshipman’s loop, monkey’s fist, versatackle…

posted by latiolais at 0800  

Monday, June 8, 2009

Excuses, excuses…

Don’t believe their lies!

I had a big lunch.

It’s homeopathic.

Guess I picked the wrong day to quit sniffing glue.

I was trying to live in obscurity.

Two words. Texas Hold’em Poker.

Felicia Day made me do it.

I was corrupted by my absolute power.

It was monkeys! Horrible flying monkeys!

I’m no Wayne Newton.

My artistic license expired.

posted by latiolais at 0800  

Thursday, June 4, 2009

I know nothing! Nothing!

UPDATE – 11 AUG 2009

It wasn’t Mr. Vernon, but a Guardian staffer who linked this pointless blog in the article. The Management stands corrected, though the unilateral proclamation of neutrality stands. – The Management

UPDATE – 10 AUG 2009

If you’re coming from Mark Vernon’s article, welcome. The Management does not mind that Mr. Vernon linked this pointless blog in his article, but it was done without consulting The Management, and the fact that it is linked does not mean that The Management supports or refutes the conclusions of the article, okay? The Management is just an innocent bystander (okay, a bystander) with an eclectic blog. – The Management

Happy Socratesmas!

Socrates asks for the check.

"ὁ δὲ ἀνεξέταστος βίος οὐ βιωτὸς ἀνθρώπῳ."

Socratic method can be used to annoy the hell out of folks.

posted by latiolais at 0800  

Monday, June 1, 2009

The Unfactâ„¢ of the Month

The Unfact™ is, to the best of our knowledge, completely false and unsupportable. We are not responsible for any consequences that are bound to occur if you are silly enough to believe it.

Socrates’ wife’s name, Xanthippe, is Greek for “Yellow Horse”. She was so named for her blonde hair and large size at birth. Her above-average physique was was a factor in her winning a gold medal in the Women’s Greco-Roman Wrestling event at the 384 BC Summer Olympiad.

"By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher." – Socrates

posted by latiolais at 0800  

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