Things to do with all the daylight we’ve saved
Open a hip, new timezone and exclude someone from it.
Add a new month and argue about who to name it for.
International Nude Sunbathing Week. Not you, though.
A 48 hour work week.
Vampire eradication. (Thanks, Mr. Mancour.)
Extend dolphin tuna fishing season.
An 8 day week, if Sir Paul and Yoko will allow.
Expand the Miss Hawaiian Tropic contest to Macaronesia, Scandinavia, and the former USSR.
Keep Ed Begley, Jr. on the road.
Around the clock Women’s Beach Volleyball.
But then, the Lingerie Football League works better at night.
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Use it to treat people with Seasonal Affective Disorder.
Let Stevie Wonder use it as a special effect when he sings “You Are the Sunshine of My Life” (not that he’ll know what it looks like).